Weekly Prompt Story: Cranberries

http://oneadayuntilthedayidie.com/?p=26792

Assumptions Based on the Prompt “Cranberries”

By Christopher Munroe

American Thanksgiving!

Right?

I assume that’s what the prompt means.

I don’t understand how American holidays are structured, honestly. Our thanksgiving is your Columbus Day? I think?

Your football’s different than ours too, and it’s nearly impossible to get a proper Ceaser down there…

…and don’t get me started on baseball. If you want to watch a sport where a thing gets hit with a stick, watch hockey like normal people!

Ah well, at least your “hit-thing-with-stick” sport isn’t Cricket. I have zero idea how Cricket works…

But I digress.

My point is, it’s American Thanksgiving! Probably!

So: Thanks, Americans!

Weekly Prompt Story: Turkey

http://oneadayuntilthedayidie.com/?p=24903

Aftermath

By Christopher Munroe

Every part of your life will be leftover turkey from this moment on.

Your breakfast tomorrow? Turkey Omelet.

Lunch? Turkey Sandwiches.

Dinner will be Turkey and tomorrow it all begins anew.

There’s nothing you can do to prevent this, no aspect of your life you can keep separate, Turkey will consume you, and yes, you will consume Turkey.

Watching Gili on Netflix? Turkey Time, gobble-gobble.

Planning a vacation to the Ottoman Empire? It’s Turkey now.

Yes, going forward your life will be a hellish, leftover turkey filled nightmare…

Wait, that sounds delicious.

Well good for you, then! And happy Thanksgiving!!!

Thanksgiving

I’m going to host a contest.

I’ll find a TV station to help, then start canvassing for donations to the food bank.

With each donation of canned goods you make, you’ll receive a vote as to what I’ll do for thanksgiving.

Should I receive enough votes, I’ll kill, pluck and prepare a Turkey, on TV, so you can follow along with me. I’ll then eat the Turkey.

If I receive enough votes the other way, I’ll kill and prepare a Puppy.

I’m a vegetarian, so I’m equally comfortable eating either one.

It should, at least, be an interesting academic exercise.