Comfort and Joy

He came with a message of peace.

No, literally. Every time he came he uttered a message of peace.

A message so profound that none could deny it. The sort that, once heard, demanded obedience, and that nobody could ignore.

He spoke of peace on earth, love for all, and everyone who heard him forever changed, rededicating themselves to the benefit of all.

His message will change the world, save mankind from its own petty selfishness, start a new age where paradise reigns o’er earth.

However, he only did this when he came.

Long story short, we’re producing porn now.

The Audition

I’d never placed an ad on Craigslist before, but the interface was user-friendly enough, so no trouble there…

Wanted: Young, uninhibited women to audition for BJ videos. Pays $50 to auditioners, $500 to the women cast in the actual video. Nude scenes necessary, contact email below.

The email address was a dummy I’d set up for the purposes of the ad. I knew I’d be receiving a lot of email from a lot of women I’d likely want nothing to do with, and I wanted to be able to abandon the address when I was done with it, never thinking of any of it ever again.

I mean, who responds to an ad like that?

A surprising number of people, as it turns out...

I don’t know if it’s the economy or what, but when I checked my email Monday I already had three hundred replies. Three hundred women who, for one reason or another, were willing to respond to an add like that on Craigslist. Disturbing, if you think about it.

I tried not to think about it as I deleted each and every one of the emails, unread.

This wasn’t about them, it’d never been about them. Their emails were just a byproduct of an unrelated agenda.

I wasn’t even really paying attention to their subject lines as I deleted them. I knew what I was looking for, and I knew it wasn’t there.

You’d already told me, after all, to expect your email Tuesday.

By which point another hundred fifty emails had arrived. Weeding through them was tougher, logistically speaking, as this time I was actually looking for something. But eventually all but one had been deleted. I responded as politely and professionally as I could, you responded back, an uncomfortable edge to your email, and we made our plans to meet.

So here I am, in a hastily constructed video studio in my living room, waiting for you to arrive. And when you do, we’ll see how your “audition” goes, and if you do well, we’ll see what other “projects” I might want to involve you in.

And I’ll do my best, through all of this, to be comfortable with the part I am to play in the process.

I honestly will do my best, nervous and somewhat icky though I am by the seediness of it all.

I’ll do it because you’re my wife.

And I love you.

And yes, I’m willing to play along with your kinks.