Returning from work today, I found my roommate hovering in midair in front of our building, a pair of butterfly wings sprouting from her back.
The wings were, I had to admit, beautiful. Gold and blue and orange, stretching out six feet to either side of her, they glistened in the evening light as she flitted to and fro.
I’ve evolved, she beamed, a chance mutation has caused me to become a more viable organism!
Evolution does not work that way, I told her evenly, which I think you know perfectly well.
And with that, she fell to the ground.